Im A Psychiatrist… Here Is The Worrying Sign That You Could Have A Personality Disorder

A psychiatrist has revealed the subtle sign you may have a personality disorder – and it involves just one thing.

Professor Ahmed Hankir, a consultant psychiatrist who often posts to TikTok about different mental health disorders, shared a video describing a particular symptom that people should be aware of: limerence.

‘Have you ever been so obsessed with someone that your entire world revolves around them – even when they ignore you or hurt you?’ he asked in the video.

‘That might not just be love,’ the specialist warned. ‘It could be limerence, one of the least known but most painful symptoms of borderline personality disorder.’

Dr Haniker explained that limerence is an intense, emotional fixation or infatuation with one specific person.

Often, he said, this fixation is aimed at someone emotionally unavailable and who may not treat people well.

He said that someone suffering with BPD ‘idealizes’ a certain person and puts them on a pedestal.

‘You crave their validation like oxygen and even the smallest breadcrumb of attention feels euphoric,’ he described.

Dr Hankir said that this person may go on to make the person the center of their universe, even if they are dismissive, abusive, or rude.

‘When they pull away, it can feel like your world collapses,’ he said.

According to the expert, limerence is thought to stem from early attachment wounds.

‘Many people with BPD describe having an inconsistent or emotionally absent caregiver, sometimes a father figure, sometimes a mother,’ he explained.

‘As adults, they unconsciously recreate that dynamic, chasing people who replicate that same emotional distance, desperately trying to earn the love they never consistently received.’

He said limerence can be the worst symptom of BPD as it hijacks a person’s identity.

‘You lose yourself in the pursuit of another person’s approval, and when that person withdraws, rejects you, or replaces you, the pain can be so intense and overwhelming that it feels unbearable,’ he said.

The doctor added that it can result in rage, despair, or even suicidal thoughts, urging anyone who has experienced this to seek help.

‘With therapy, especially dialectical behavioral therapy, you can learn to regulate these emotions and rebuild your sense of self,’ he assured viewers.

‘True healing starts when your world begins to revolve around you again,’ he said.

BPD is a personality disorder which, as per the American Psychological Association, is ‘characterized by a long-standing pattern of instability in mood, interpersonal relationships, and self-image that is severe enough to cause extreme distress or interfere with social and occupational functioning.’

According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), BPD affects between 1.6 to 5.9 percent of adults in the US.

NAMI said that BPD involves severe difficulty regulating emotions, leading to intense mood swings, impulsive behavior, unstable relationships and a poor self-image.

It added that symptoms of BPD may include avoiding real or perceived abandonment, inappropriate and intense anger or problems controlling anger, self-harming behavior and recurring thoughts of suicide, mood swings, and a distorted and unstable sense of self.