An Australian life coach has ignited a debate after calling out a toxic new trend she says is quietly destroying friendships, romantic relationships and even workplace dynamics.

Felicity Morgan, 35, has built an online platform thanks to her brutally honest insights into relationships, self-worth and female dynamics.

But her latest warning, that is centred on a behaviour she calls ‘pedestalling,’ has struck a particularly raw nerve.

It’s a pattern she said she’s witnessed for years while coaching than 10,000 clients through her self-development company. And according to her, it’s far dangerous than many women realise.

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‘Pedestalling is when someone doesn’t see you, they see the fantasy version of you they’ve created,’ she told Daily Mail.

‘It’s when admiration crosses into obsession, and they start projecting who they wish they were onto you. It’s not love. Its worship disguised as connection.’

According to Felicity, pedestalling is the first step in a disturbing cycle that almost always ends in resentment.

‘It’s when someone idolises you with a plan of eventually demonising you,’ she warned in a recent

that has amassed thousands of views and comments online.

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‘Whether they’re conscious of this pattern or not, their end game is to end up feeling better than people they feel inferior to.’

The life coach laid out the stages, starting with love bombing, then feeding off your confidence, followed by rising insecurity, villainising, and finally moving on to the next target.

And she insists this isn’t merely a theory, it’s something she has seen play out repeatedly and experienced many times herself.

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A modern twist on tall poppy syndrome

Felicity coined the term after seeing the same behaviour surface again and again, particularly ‘among insecure people who latch onto someone they admire,’ which she adds, is deeply embedded in Australian culture.

‘We love the underdog until their greatness highlights or hits on our insecurities, then we turn on them.’

‘Where we love the Australian sweetheart until she gets too famous and the whole nation turns on her. As humans, we struggle with people being better than us.’

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Pedestalling is especially common among women

The behaviour, she says, is rife in female friendships, where the lines between admiration and envy can blur dangerously fast.

‘Women tend to bond through wanting to be like that person. We attach to women we see as ‘better’ than us so we can feel ‘enough’ by proximity.

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‘But we can’t handle feeling inferior for long periods of time so eventually that admiration turns to jealousy and the relationship implodes. One minute you’re their inspiration, the next you’re their enemy.’

And it’s not just friendships that suffer. The same pattern, she says, is rife in corporate environments too.

‘It’s extremely toxic. This is super common in corporate dynamics as well where people try to feed off others who are above them with a plan to destroy them once they’re done with them.’

The psychology behind the behaviour

According to Felicity, pedestalling is rooted in a desperate need to feel superior and in modern society, it’s becoming increasingly common.

‘They (the pedestaller) can’t handle other people being better than them in certain areas. They’re too self-obsessed and make other people’s greatness mean something about them.’

Today’s generation, she argues, enter relationships with an agenda of ‘what can I get from someone?’

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And rather than developing confidence or resilience, she said many try to ‘borrow’ someone else’s power.

‘They feed off your energy to feel powerful, but the moment that stops working, they need to tear you down to rebalance the dynamic.’

Felicity noted that she has been a victim of pedestalling times than she can count, and heartbreakingly, even by people she trusted most. However, there’s one experience still shocks her years later.

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‘I found out one of my longest clients of three years secretly was my online troll.’

‘Instead of ending the relationship and firing me, they found a way to beat me down to make themselves feel better, which was trolling me from their burner account.’

How to spot it early

The early signs of pedestalling are easy to miss, according to Felicity, because they often feel flattering.

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Behaviours like showering others in praise, over-identifying with them, attaching themselves too closely, and ‘making you their everything’ – at least at the start, can pose as big red flags.

‘You don’t need to confront these dynamics, you just need to get good at spotting them, so you don’t do the dance with them.’

Because the ending, she said, is almost always inevitable, ‘so if you can’t stop the projection, simply stop participating in it.’

‘Notice when it’s happening and slowly create distance with them. They’ll soon move onto their next victim.’

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